I’ve been seeing this quote a lot lately. “Hurt people, hurt people”. I think that it is true. We are living in a time where bullying and suicide is happening and the conversation is starting. People are bringing light to a situation that needs to be talked about. I’ve always been interested in why people do and say the things they do and say. I find it fascinating. Every human being is so different and we all react to things differently. Years ago, I was a completely different person. The way I thought and reacted to things was completely different than it is now.
Recently, I have had another human being say some pretty horrible things about me lol I say “lol” for a reason and I’ll explain why. That was my first reaction to it… laughter. It was actually quite liberating! It honestly shocked me a little bit. How could I laugh at something that was so horrible and directed at me and people I love? I’ll explain that too.
There was a time, not too long ago, that I cared about what others said and thought. That mindset has changed and it took a lot of growth, education, mental strength, counseling, and self awareness. You see it every day don’t you? On Facebook political debates or comments on celebrity Instagram pages. Other human beings try SO HARD to hurt other people. They somehow find the time to sit down and write horrible things to other people in an attempt to embarrass them or make them feel bad. What ends up happening is, they just end up embarrassing themselves. I recently read some horrible comments on “JWOWW” from Jersey Shore’s Instagram page. My first thought was, why would someone sit down, find the time to come up with some hurtful and harmful comments and send them to her, just to try to bring her down? (Let’s be honest, what makes those people think anyone gives a shit about their opinion in the first place)?
I believe those people that do those things, ARE hurt. They hurt, so they find a way to hurt others so that they don’t feel alone in that. I think it’s a lack of maturity, self awareness, or in some cases just plain jealousy. Life is SO short. Why do people waste such precious time with hateful hearts? There is so much to do and so little time! Spend it with the people you love. Spend it doing the things you are passionate about. Don’t spend it trying your hardest to hurt other people. In a time like this, where people are actually taking their own lives after being bullied over and over, how could anyone still want to contribute to that? Let’s change that quote up there to “hurt people *try to* hurt people”. Because it doesn’t HAVE to work. Luckily for me, I’m in the best place I have ever been, mentally. That may not be the case for the next person and that could be a life threatening situation.
I’ve taken the time this year to improve myself as a mother, a wife, and a person in general. I’ve blogged about making changes and improvements in my life because I felt that is what needed to happen! I took control. The reason I’m writing this is because I hope everyone can come to a secure place within themselves one day. I want people to get to a place where what someone says goes through one ear and out the other. I also want people to just laugh. It’s not going to happen over night. You have to ask yourself… how does one person’s opinion change your life? It doesn’t. Not even a little bit. You may think it does, but it has no place in dictating any part of your life. You know yourself better than anyone. You know who you are. The people who love you, know who you are. Feel secure in THOSE feelings. Those are the feelings that are valid. You are valid. You are worthy. You are loved. You are beautiful.
Years ago, a wise friend of mine, named Jess, sent me a quote in regards to an ex-boyfriend. While it is SO relevant to a toxic relationship, I believe that this is valid in so many aspects of life. This quote has always been near and dear to my heart. While I read this for the first time many years ago, it didn’t sink in until I was much older.
“Don’t let his negative opinion of you affect you, it’s NOT a reflection of you, rather, a perception of his own reality”.